Cracked nipples is a common problem for breastfeeding mums. It is normally a sign that something is not quite right. The term cracked nipples was a euphemism. A gentle term describing the raw, bleeding wounds on such a sensitive part of my body. The problem is that once damage has been done, if the cause isn't resolved immediately, the damage struggles to heal. I was told my nipples needed to 'toughen up' as a first time breastfeeding mother. Advised to use nipple shields (a silicone teat that is placed over the nipple to give a larger/firmer object for baby to latch to) which can be very useful in certain circumstances but can also restrict milk transfer, particularly in a baby who is not feeding efficiently. A Tongue tie is where the bit of tissue connecting the tongue to the bottom of the mouth (frenulum) is tight or short. It can restrict tongue movement and may cause problems feeding. My baby was checked for tongue tie by several midwives both in hospital and at home. A posterior tongue tie was then diagnosed at 2 weeks by a private lactation consultant. 2 days later it was snipped by a private practitioner. I was told the wait on the NHS could be 6-8 weeks. I dont think I would have continued to try to breastfeed if we had to wait that time. Those 2 visits cost the same as a 3* holiday to the Costa del Sol which I would have gladly taken at that point! Diagnosis of tongue tie has increased massively in recent years. Some cite more women trying to breastfeed as the cause of this as it can cause the baby to struggle latching onto the breast deeply, often leading to pain for mother and poor weight gain due to ineffective feeding. Tongue tied babies can also experience problems bottle feeding. Some mums and babies manage feeding well with tongue tie. Having a frenotomy (the piece of skin cut to release the tightness) is only part of the treatment. Working on positioning and attachment of the baby at the breast, encouraging them to take a large mouthful of breast (not just nipple) and aiming for the nipple to reach the soft palate, is just as, if not more, important. The moral of the story here is that if you feel something is not right, ask for a 2nd opinion. The phrase 'the latch looks fine' when it isn't is like a kick in the teeth as if 'nothing can be done'. If the 2nd opinion doesnt sound right to you, ask for a 3rd, 4th or 5th opinion. Ask to see the infant feeding specialist. Some regions have lactation consultants working within NHS teams. I talk about tongue tie here but it could be any range of problems. Pain when breastfeeding is common. That doesnt make it normal. A wise woman (the leader of my local LLL group) is well known to have said "most breastfeeding problems can be resolved with some tweaking". Its hard to believe when your in the thick of it but it's true. Reach out for help. And if the help doesnt help, ask again. Feeding and Feelings by Kat HerzmarkToday is the start of world breastfeeding week and this week I would like to share some themes that have come up surrounding my breastfeeding journey. I hope they resonate in some way with others. I wanted to share a little bit about my feelings surrounding feeding my baby, which surprised me from the start. At our recent LLL (La Leche League who provide "friendly breastfeeding support") meeting we talked about how we can discus/promote breastfeeding without it coming across as judgemental of how others feed their babies. However, we also talked about how many mums were pushed into giving their babies formula (by other mums, family members and health care professionals) as a solution for problems (slow weight gain, sleepless nights, high needs babies) but it would never be ok to say to a bottle feeding mum - "why dont you breastfeed, it's the best thing for your baby". It would seem insensitive, indeed it is. But why is the same not true for the opposite? This is in no way intended to judge or shame anyone who couldn't or didn't breastfeed. But we have to be frank and acknowledge that a mother's milk is the most biologically suited food for her baby, not to mention many other benefits for both mother and baby. My baby was born big and healthy. Feeding her was challenging from the start. She was sleepy and struggled latching to my breast, not having her first feed until 10 hours after birth. At her 10 day check, at which point the expectation is that birth weight should be regained, she had lost further weight. We were then visited every 2 days. Every weigh in was filled with dread. On each visit the numbers on the scale dropped, along with my confidence. The advice from midwives, health visitors, and later, as her weight loss became more worrying, pediatricians, was to top her up with formula. No mention of addressing the breastfeeding difficulties we were having or protecting my milk production. I was surprised at my strength of feeling towards making breastfeeding work. I didnt think I would be bothered about how I fed her as long as she was healthy. In the midst of the Coronavirus pandemic, I saw posts on breastfeeding groups about the benefit of breastmilk for producing antibodies, helping babies fight infections and viruses they came into contact with. I felt that if I couldn't give her my milk, I would be setting her up to fail should any of us contract the virus. People would say "it's not the end of the world if you bottle feed her". It's true, it wouldn't have been the end of the world, but at the time it felt the end of my world. Before having children I think many people just want to be enough for their children, and here I was, not enough. I sobbed when my partner went to buy a tin of formula. I cried when we made up the first bottle, even harder when my baby gulped it down. At the same time, I was in tears at each breastfeed, gritting my teeth through the pain, anxiously watching my baby's jaw to see if she was swallowing, wondering how much I would have to top her up with and pump afterwards. A strange mix of feelings. Wanting to feed her in the way nature intended but angry at how difficult i found it, hating myself for not wanting to cope with the pain and feeling very far from the bonding experience other mums described. I had no idea the emotions attached to feeding your baby, not helped by crazy postnatal hormones! For a long time I hated feeding my baby. And that's OK. Now I love it (most of the time!) and that's OK too. #WBW2020 #realbreastfeedingstories #lalecheleague #WABA Normalising breastfeedingFeeding in public is a tricky one. I want to be all brave and brazen and 'I don't care, I'm just feeding my baby'. But the truth is, I still get embarrassed. Essentially, you are still exposing part of your body in public. I didn't get much practice at feeding out and about due to being lockdown for the first few months of my baby's life. It doesn't always look like this. Her sun hat isn't always on, perfectly covering the action! She moves and kicks and thrashes about getting latched on. She pulls the muslin I use to cover myself off as she doesn't like it. We are not always on a fairly quiet beach with only the waves looking on. She will pull off my boob to look up at something, just at the wrong moment, as someone walks past, or a waiter comes to take our order. Sometimes we've both been distracted and by the time I try to get her to feed she is hungry and/or tired and screams at my awaiting boob, a bit overwhelmed and not sure whether hunger/sleep/play should take priority. Feeding in public is generally a fumble of vest tops, bra clasps and breast pads, often with an inpatient baby. But I will continue to do it as long as i want to and my baby needs it. I think I can count on one hand the number of times I have seen a woman breastfeed, bar family and a couple of close friends. I am spurred on and encouraged everytime I see it - so, please, for me and so many others, keep boobing! Breastfeeding Support
[last one - I promise!] At a recent LLL meeting we discussed breastfeeding rates, being desperately low in the UK and the varied support, and sometimes lack of, mums received to help establish breastfeeding. I have also learnt that some health professionals have little knowledge or training in breastfeeding, even those involved in maternity, post natal and baby care. There are some staggering facts around the numbers of lives worldwide (mothers and babies) that could be saved through breastfeeding and huge differences in UK hospital admissions for respiratory and gastrointestinal infections between formula fed and breastfed babies. 'Fed is best' is a phrase banded about quite often, seemingly in response to the 'breast is best' slogan. Of course I agree that a baby being fed must be the priority and respect any mother's decision of how they feed their baby but feel this is often used as an alternative for providing good quality breastfeeding support. Unfortunately, many mums stop breastfeeding before they wanted to, because of difficulties they encountered. Note I use the word stop rather than 'give up'. Because stopping breastfeeding is not failing. It is a decision made, often when you see no other way. Pain, cracked nipples, slow weight gain, fussy babies, low supply (or perception of), exhaustion, being the sole 'feeder', anxiety over feeding in public are among common reasons mums stop breastfeeding. Lots of these difficulties can be resolved or alleviated with good support. Levels of support for breastfeeding vary massively across the country and even within the same areas depending on what particular health professionals you encounter. World Breastfeeding Week campaigns (among other things) for government to promote and support breastfeeding. Most (all?) hospitals are signed up to UNICEF's breastfeeding friendly initiative but in practice I'm not sure what this means. In my experience, midwives have very little training in breastfeeding. It is not their fault, but they are ill equipped to offer prompt, evidence based support to mums struggling to breastfeed. Like so many things, the resources are not there for training and additional staff. I was on the post natal ward for 36hrs after having my baby and saw a midwife twice in that time. Once was to say "if the baby hasn't fed by 3pm we will give her a cup of formula". However, I have been impressed to hear of others getting good advice, health visitors and midwives working with mums to help achieve their goals. But this isn't what I experienced. Where I did find support was through voluntary organisations or private professionals - either end of the spectrum. I found my local La Leche League group, the wonderful VOLUNTEER leader who gave me 1-1 support, the lovely mums who shared their experiences, gave me kind words of encouragement and have now become friends. I joined a facebook group run by experienced IBCLCs and breastfeeding counsellors which gave evidence and experience based advice. I was lucky I found (and crucially could afford) a lactation consultant who identified problems, proposed solutions and helped develop a plan together. It was not easy. I have learnt so much in the last 5 months and I can now spot points in our journey, even before birth that might have positively affected my ability to breastfeed. I cant help but think if support was there earlier, straight after birth, at the hospital, as soon as we got home, things may have been different for me and so many other mums who struggle breastfeeding. I have been totally heart warmed reading stories from friends and strangers this week. While I have got a bit carried away, I've found writing a bit about my own journey cathartic and empowering. Thank you for reading and for the lovely comments I've received.
0 Comments
Leave a Reply. |
AuthorThe mothers of La Leche League Barnet. These Blog posts were inspired by a discussion during our Zoom meeting in August 2020, during World Breastfeeding Week. We talked about influences on our breastfeeding journeys: our initial imagination of the process and how reality shaped us, and was shaped by us and our circumstances. Please enjoy reading these raw and honest accounts, to give you a more realistic picture of what breastfeeding can look like in REALITY. Share widely if you wish. ArchivesCategories |